It's great—except that you have no idea where things stand. If it's been about six months and he hasn't dropped one hint about where he sees this going, casually speak up, says Jennifer Kelman , a licensed social worker and relationship expert at Pearl. Be in a relationship where you feel good when you're without him, but you feel even better with him. You're both sushi aficionados, his big brown eyes make you melt, and he even laughs out loud at The Mindy Project.
No need to sign up at the homeless shelter only to impress him. Unplug to Connect Thinkstock Think beyond dinner and after-drinks for your next date. Make Sure You Want This Thinkstock You think you desire something serious with this particular guy—but before you do anything else, be sure. Instead have your own interests to show him how exciting your life is, with or without him. Keep up your long runs on the weekends even if he wants to hang out, and don't expect or nag him to skip his weekly basketball games in favor of seeing you. Create a Little Mystery Thinkstock Even if you're anxiously awaiting his call, you shouldn't be available every time he wants to see you. When you're a kind and gracious person, men and women are more likely to want to be around you—both consciously and subconsciously. If not, you may be dealing with a narcissist—run! If it's been about six months and he hasn't dropped one hint about where he sees this going, casually speak up, says Jennifer Kelman , a licensed social worker and relationship expert at Pearl. One thing to look out for: If you feel confident at this point that you want things to be serious, go ahead and tell him, Trespicio says. Step back and ask yourself the following questions, Trespicio suggests: Maintain Your Autonomy—and His Too Thinkstock It's easy to let parts of yourself go when you meet someone you think is the man of your dreams. Does he seem genuinely interested in what you have to say? Little things in your everyday life, from buying coffee for the woman in line behind you to walking your neighbor's dog, count too. However you can use these tips to subtly up the chances that he'll want to turn casual dating into something more. And never tell yourself, "He's a nice guy and has done nothing wrong, so I guess I should be with him. For example, if you'd like him to meet your parents, ask if he'd be up for going out to dinner with them, but let him know there's no harm if he's not quite ready for that yet. If you'd rather go to the GYN than watch football, don't pretend to love the Steelers just because the guy you're seeing is a fan. The more he sees that you have a fantastic life of your own, the more likely he'll want to jump in and be a part of it. But if he still doesn't respond when you bring it up again, it may be time to rethink the relationship. When you're out to dinner, make sure not to constantly check your phone or dart your eyes around the room. In a recent British study, people rated potential sexual partners to be more attractive for a long-term relationship if they had altruistic qualities. This helps him to realize that your time is valuable and that he'll have to go out of his way to see you. It's dating , but show you're interested in what he has to say and ask about his life. Does he try to see you whenever he's free? Check out a craft beer festival, see a local band at some hole-in-the-wall, or challenge him to a mountain bike race.
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